COVID-19

The pandemic is not over. I have had a very direct reminder of this fact; I tested positive for COVID-19. It is not pleasant. In my case, fatigue and chills have been the most severe. I did not need to go to the hospital. My partner is ever patient and caring to attend to me. We think perhaps she was infected previously…

At a time when virtually all restrictions are being lifted in my part of the world. Where those around me are behaving as though there is nothing happening. No pandemic at least. Trying desperately to return to “normal.” For them, I think “normal” means back to the way things were.

But not just prepandemic times; not just back to 2019. I think they are referring to some imagined glory days that supposedly existed in some indeterminate history, when men were men and woman were good wives. A time when wealthy, privileged, white men ruled over everything, and everyone else did as they were told.

I see glimpses of this mentality in the likes of Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin. People who are unhappy with how things are in the world and wish them to be more hospitable to their own desires. To be able to play golf all day or ride horses. Not having to worry about where their next meal will come from, or whether they will have access to doctors should they be infected with some rampant disease. To be carefree and unaccountable to their own actions.

At least, this is what it looks like to me. From my vantage point, I can see very little. While I do believe there is something horrible happening in Ukraine presently, I cannot deny the possibility that it is all simply orchestrated for my benefit. The possibility exists, though the possibility seems incredibly remote.

I watch the world from my home. I watch the world through my television, both the broadcast shows and those streamed online. My television is my computer monitor. All that I see could be fabricated, as if I were Truman Burbank himself. The only things I can really be confident about are my partner and this room.

And this illness. I can have confidence that I feel like absolute crap.

The pandemic is not over. I’ve heard there may be a new variant on the horizon. Another disease trying to wipe us out. Perhaps it is time to stop being afraid and take our chances.